Just Because the Shoe Fits...

My father doesn't have a sneaker collection. I never wanted to dress like him, not because I thought he was tacky, but because I outweighed him by the time I was eleven. By no means was my upbringing a struggle that would make Oliver Twist look like Ricky Stratton, but it wasn't quite the charmed life either. My desire to make the evolution from nerdy to cool kid (wait, you can be both?) trumped the idea that my parents couldn't afford the freshest gear. The motto for sneaker shopping "$50 or less you man footed little crumb snatcher" (I'm quoting very loosely here.)  It didn't matter who I wanted to impress, or why.  The price better be right on those kicks, or you better open a sweatshop Peasy.

When my parents finally gave me some leeway on their strict budget (I guess all that taking edumication seriously stuff finally paid off) to let me cop a pair of Nike Air Veers (pictured above) I treated the shoes with the respect and reverence Moses would give the Arc of the Covenant.  I wasn't going to extremes, but I needed to show them and myself that I can and would take their investment in me seriously.

Copped 'dem Air Dexters

This post isn't supposedly to be about how I became a borderline sneakerhead, I've found myself the father of four beautiful children, two of them teenage boys. Guess whose meager shoe collection they want to pillage?

We've all had that problem. The "let me put my stank ass feet in your fresh kicks" problem. The death stare given to those with that inquiry is almost automatic.

You can't (shouldn't) glare at your budding teenager(s) this way. I feel like it's my responsibility to give them some insight and pointers on this sort of thing. I'm not passing this off as a end all be all guide, just some advice and pointers I've given to the youngins under my wing. Now here come the bullets!! (No Chiraq-o)

• Keep it real, get your own shit man, and be original

 "That's all man And you'll be a better man And you gonna come out on your own way"

I mention to my sons that they don't have to wear what everyone else is.  It's the old "If everyone els ejumped off a bridge..." cliche. Wear what you like. What makes you feel comfortable and most importantly what makes you feel confident.  That Jordan logo isn't going to help with that. Which brings me to my next point.

• All that Glitters...

Separating the real from the fake is vital. I practice "fake it till you make it" to a certain degree, but never ever ever ever when it comes to sneakers. Kicks, just like the friends and associates they'll have in school quality trumps quantity. I preach frugality, but paying more for products that will last for years rather than less for a piece of crap knockoff that may not even make it out the box to your foot is an easy choice.

• You See This? Get Used to It

I am not made of money, and neither is your mother! Keep them shits clean, and crease free. Don't think you'll be fucking up our washing machine either. Get to scrubbing. In other words, take care of what is important to you and get good grades and don't hit your sister and do your chores and say your prayers and eat your vitamins. Maybe...just maybe a new pair will be in your future.

I'll have this fatherhood shit down pat...